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Team_Albatross Forum
Guild forum |
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youtheman
Par
Joined: 21 Sep 2008
Posts: 68
Location: Dover, England
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 Posted:
Fri Sep 26, 2008 9:10 am |
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The unluckiest guy in the world decides one day that he’s had enough and he’s going to commit suicide so he checks the train timetable and sets off towards a nearby bridge with the intention of hurling himself off in front of the train. As he is walking through the park, obviously somewhat distracted, he trips over something half buried in the ground and bangs his head on a stone, knocking himself unconscious. After a little while he comes to and notices that the thing he tripped over is a rusty old lamp. As it looks quite old he looks it over and notices an inscription, which is mostly obscured by mud, and rubs it so he can see it better. In a puff of smoke a genie appears.
“Thank you master” says the genie, “You have freed me from my prison and as a reward I shall grant you a wish, anything you want”.
“Yeah right” says the unluckiest man in the world, “You expect me to believe that crock of **it”
“It’s true” says the genie “Try me, what have you got to lose?”.
“I suppose so. Ok then I want you to make me lucky”
“Right then, it is done. You are now lucky beyond your wildest imagination” and with
These words the genie and the lamp disappear.
“What a load of crap” thinks the unlucky one and continues on his way.
After a few yards he notices that his shoelaces has worked loose so he bends over to do it up. While he’s crouched down he spots a £10 note on the ground just a few feet away and picks it up.
“Wow, that’s never happened to me before” he thinks. “Maybe my luck is changing after all.”
“ There’s only one way to find out” So he goes to the betting shop and finds the biggest outsider of the day a 500 to 1 shot. He puts the £10 on it to win. To his amazement the horse comes in first and he wins £5000.
“Bloody hell”, he thinks “That was lucky.” But he’s still not convinced. So to convince himself he decides to go clubbing and see if he can pull the best looking girl he can find.
So he kits himself out with a new suit & new shoes and goes to the local nightspot.
As soon as he is in there he spots this absolutely gorgeous asian girl. She is so pretty that every single man in the club is spellbound watching her dancing.
He wanders over to the bar and orders a drink, and watches the asian beauty like all the others. After a few seconds she stops and walks over to him and says “Hi there handsome”. “Hi” he says “Can I buy you a drink”. “No forget the drink, let’s just go back to my place.”
“Wow he thinks, this is incredible” and off they go.
They get to her house and go in. “Shall we have a coffee or something?” he asks her.
“No” She replies, “I can’t wait a second more. I must have you right now. Come to the bedroom with me” and she grabs him and pulls him into the bedroom. She rips his clothes off and strips naked herself and gets on the bed with him and they start making love.
As he is doing the business he finds himself getting distracted by the red spot in the middle of her forehead. It fills his head and he can’t think of anything else. He stops what he is doing and says “I’m really sorry love, I just can’t do this”
“Why, What’s the matter?” she asks
“It’s that spot on your forehead, it’s really doing my head in” he replies
“Oh that! It’s nothing just make up. If it bothers you rub it off” she says
“Ok then” he says and rubs off the spot.
“F***ing hell” he says in amazement “I’ve won a car” |
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Cookie21
Double Bogey
Joined: 22 Mar 2008
Posts: 22
Location: Wales
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| Posted:
Fri Sep 26, 2008 9:28 am |
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lmao  |
_________________
Regards Cookie21 |
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CSpirit
HIO
Joined: 20 Apr 2007
Posts: 524
Location: Virginia, USA
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| Posted:
Fri Sep 26, 2008 10:34 am |
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LOL YTM  |
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